God's Own Electric Circus

Yesterday was phase one of Spring training. The crew consisted of one Robert Macmillan, one Crazy Dwaine Bird, and Myself. It took place in the parking lot of the Gray, right under the brilliant lights of the old Winslonian stomping grounds. Symbolic? We played from dusk, until the daylight completely faded. The ever-waning light making every subsequent throw of our dirty water-logged ball all that much more dangerous.

There were a few Special Olympic scouts out to view our performance. It is good to see interest this early in, but for the most part they pretended to be picking bottles or walking small children. Which is understandable as you don't want to let on early who you're planing on drafting to the Allstars.

Dwaine seemed to be having trouble holding on to pop flyes, and blocking grounders. At first we attributed this to our rusty baseball skills, but as it continued even after the warm-up we could see that there was indeed a severe problem that was inhibiting Ernies catching ability. It wasn't till sometime later when we had bought our popcorn and harrassed Walmart and were back at Dwaines fab pad, that the problem finally came to light. We were playing computer hockey when I spotted a tiny-totts baseball mitt sitting on the bedstand next to a large container of Tuna Helper. It must be a sentimental souveneir from mosquito I rationalized... But no, this tiny pint-sized mitt was Dwaine's game glove. The thing was barely as big as his hand for Christ sakes!

"Why would you buy such a ridiculously small glove Dwaine," I questioned.

"'Cause it was cheap," he replied laconically.

"It was cheap because it's a f**cking 12 years olds glove you moron!"

To which Dwaine shrugged and zenly utterred, "myeh!?"...

For the rest of the night we played PS2. Where Dwaine showed great poise during his GTA chainsaw masacres, I think he's a natural... I left my PS2 in his care, so he could further hone his skills.

PS: If for some or any reason my PS2 or any of its components are broken, damaged or in any way altered from their original condition.... Your (Dwaine's) life is forfeit.

PSS: Input is needed regarding times and locations of our next practices, please view the message board concerning this matter. 0 comments